Imagine the Giant Omelets

I don’t know why we are still mucking around with Iraq, when Iran would be a much better target for us to attack. After all, those kooky Persians are all but begging for a big old slice of American Ass Whoopin’ by flaunting their gigantic ostrich meat sandwiches. The 1500 meter sandwich in question was created in hopes of earning a spot in the Guinness Records while promoting Iran’s ostrich farming industry. 1500 meters is just a couple hundred feet short of a mile and anyone who has the time to make a mile long sandwich filled with exotic meats must have enough time to make weapons of mass destruction. Quite frankly I believe that ostrich meat itself could be considered a weapon of mass destruction. I am also starting to wildly speculate that the mile of sandwich was just part of a much larger Middle Eastern sandwich ring. A ring, that when completed, will form the worlds largest super sandwich collider. This sandwich collider may not be able to create black holes like the Hadron Large Collider will (when ever they get that working again), but instead it will have the potential to cover the earth with an explosion of rice and lentils…a possibility that causes me to loose sleep at night.

Speaking of loosing sleep here are a few WTF videos that will give you the heebee-jeebees.

I always knew that starlings were excellent mimics, but I never realized that when they mimic they sound like the voice of Satan. While watching this I couldn’t believe that this was what these birds actually sound like, I assumed they would have a clearer voice like a parrot but after digging around the internets for more samples I found this to be a common vocalization. Here is Damar the starling, he has a lot of freaky stuff to talk about, most of it in the language of demons(he also does some R2-D2 style screatching too).


via videosift.com

This is a music video for a song called Phantom Pt. II. I kinda dig the song, but it was the very bizarre video that brought it here to roost.


via videosift.com